I attended a meeting last week . . . the same one I attend every month. At this particular meeting, we began talking about networking events, asking one another what events we attend, which ones produce useful referrals, which ones do not, and so forth. In the context of our discussion, a “networking event” is a new business development activity whereby people gather to meet and greet, exchange business cards, and generally, try to plant the seeds of mutually beneficial relationships. Sounds OK, doesn’t it? But as our discussion unfolded, we found ourselves in agreement on several surprising conclusions:
- Traditional networking events suck.
- Traditional networking events don’t produce useful referrals.
- Traditional networking events tend to attract more takers than givers.
Collectively, we decided there’s a better way to make connections that are satisfying, sustainable, and rewarding. If you’re interested in hearing more about this, please continue reading below.
“Networking is rubbish; have friends instead.” – Steve Winwood
The problem with most traditional networking events is this: the selection process for attendees is almost entirely random. People may be members of the same umbrella organization (like a chamber of commerce, for instance), but there’s no other glue, no common thread that binds them together. So they’re young and old, male and female, and they’re from an entire spectrum of organizations . . . large and small, manufacturing, service, retail, hospitality, not-for-profit, on and on and on. In that kind of hodge podge of people, you’re probably going to walk out with a fistful of business cards that have no real value for you or your business. It’s a little like trying to find your soul mate in a crowded bar . . . could happen, but the odds are heavily against you.
There’s a lot of truth in the notion that people do business with people they know, like, and trust. But in the sort randomized networking events described above, how can you hope to develop strong know/like/trust relationships? Pretty tough to do. So what’s the alternative?
According to the people in last week’s discussion, their best, most productive referral sources come from pursuing other, mostly non-business, interests. They might come from serving on the Board of a charitable foundation, or from serving on a committee at church, or from joining a book club. Maybe your passion is chess, or scuba diving, or doing volunteer conservation work. Whatever it is, when you pursue your passion by joining with others who share your interest, you provide the glue that allows a long-term, know/like/trust relationship to develop . . . the kind of relationship that typically doesn’t grow from a business card swap-o-rama networking event.
We’re not talking about something cynical here . . . we’re not saying we should all go out and join the National Cancer Society because we’ll get good referrals from it. But there’s no doubt, when we need help in our business, we will turn first to a friend. So the question is, where are such friendships most likely to take root? In traditional networking events? Or in groups of people working or playing together in pursuit of a shared interest?
