If I had to pick one business skill above all others, I\u2019d picked listening.\u00a0 Not hearing.\u00a0 Listening.\u00a0 Hearing is passive, listening is active.\u00a0 Actually, listening isn\u2019t just a business skill, it\u2019s more of a life skill.\u00a0 And it\u2019s a critical skill because whatever problem you\u2019re facing, the clues to its solution are all around you with your employees, your customers, your vendors, and yes, with your friends and family too.\u00a0 But there\u2019s a secret to great listening skills.\u00a0 If you want to learn that secret, please read below.<\/p>\n
\u201cThe occupational disease of a poor executive is an inability to listen\u201d<\/strong> Poor listeners are easily distracted.\u00a0 A poor listener will notice, \u201cThis guy has the biggest nose I\u2019ve ever seen!\u00a0 Wonder how he keeps that thing warm in the winter?\u201d\u00a0 Good listeners know how to focus, not only on the words being said, but also on nuances, on subtleties, and on inflections in the speaker\u2019s voice.\u00a0 They are able to do this even when Big Nose is talking because they realize Big Nose might also have a big brain and may have something worthwhile to say.<\/p>\n But that\u2019s not the real secret to being a great listener.<\/p>\n The real secret is \u201csuspending judgment.\u201d\u00a0 You need to let thoughts, ideas, and opinions enter your conscientiousness unfiltered by your biases and pre-conceptions.\u00a0 My friend Russ Riendeau talks about this extensively in his audiobook, \u201cFirst Hide the Poison Arrows.\u201d\u00a0 But how can we \u201csuspend judgment?\u201d\u00a0 After all, that\u2019s what makes us the dominant species on the planet, right?\u00a0 It\u2019s our ability to use our intellect, to reason, to separate the wheat from the chaff, to understand right from wrong, and to discern a good idea from a bad one, isn\u2019t it?\u00a0 So how are we supposed to \u201csuspend\u201d all that.\u00a0 It\u2019s in our DNA for cryin\u2019 out loud!\u00a0 And even if we could \u201csuspend judgment,\u201d why would we want to?<\/p>\n Several reasons:<\/p>\n 1)\u00a0As soon as you render a judgment about what someone else is saying, listening stops.\u00a0 It stops at that very instant because your mind is now formulating your brilliant rebuttal to what is clearly a stupid idea.\u00a0 In short, your ego takes over and does not allow you to finish listening to the rest of the idea.\u00a0 Almost all the technological wonders we take for granted every day are here because someone was willing to \u201csuspend judgment\u201d about our ability to create them.\u00a0 In fact, I bet we wouldn\u2019t have blue M&Ms today if someone hadn\u2019t learned this vital listening secret. Being a good listener makes you a better communicator and a better leader (not to mention a better friend or a better spouse).\u00a0 So if you want to be a great listener (as you should), you can only do it through this notion of \u201csuspending judgment.\u201d\u00a0 It doesn\u2019t cost anything, it doesn\u2019t put anything at risk, and the benefits, in terms getting the best from those around you, are enormous.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" If I had to pick one business skill above all others, I\u2019d picked listening.\u00a0 Not hearing.\u00a0 Listening.\u00a0 Hearing is passive, listening is active.\u00a0 Actually, listening isn\u2019t just a business skill, it\u2019s more of a life skill.\u00a0 And it\u2019s a critical skill because whatever problem you\u2019re facing, the clues to its solution are all around you<\/p>\n
\n–\u00a0Dr. Lydia Gibers<\/p>\n
\n2)\u00a0When you give whoever is speaking to you your undivided attention . . . not just the appearance of your undivided attention, but the real thing . . . people will give you their best, candid, unvarnished thoughts, opinions, and ideas.\u00a0 They won\u2019t hold anything back.\u00a0 But if they think you\u2019re going to jump to a conclusion without hearing them out, they\u2019ll dole out the bits and pieces they think are \u201csafe\u201d to give you, and you\u2019ll never get the rest.
\n3)\u00a0You may just surprise yourself and find some real gems in some unexpected places.\u00a0 In his entire life, your cousin Charlie has never had an original thought . . . until today.\u00a0 Today lightning strikes, Charlie has a brilliant, million dollar idea, and if you have your ears on, you\u2019ll get it.\u00a0 If you don\u2019t, if you\u2019ve tuned him out, you\u2019ll kick yourself forever.
\nOf course, we can\u2019t \u201csuspend judgment\u201d indefinitely.\u00a0 At some point, we have to make a decision, choose a direction, or take an action.\u00a0 But we must suspend judgment until we have all the best thoughts, opinions and ideas out on the table\u00a0 . . . the good, the bad, the impractical, the brilliant, the out-of-the-box, the pedestrian . . .\u00a0 all of it.\u00a0 Then we can sort through it all, debate it all, and start to figure out what makes the most sense.<\/p>\n